I chose to freeze my eggs because I could. And I have never doubted my decision for a minute.
That’s all I’ve ever wanted, to make my own reproductive choices and not have regrets. No one wants to say the words, “I wish I had known....”.
I’ve always been the kind of girl who had to learn by doing. As a child/teen/college grad, whenever my parents wisely shared knowledge about a certain topic that they might possibly know just a tiny bit more about and want to guide me to a good outcome, I remained steadfast in my stubbornness to figure it out for myself. It didn’t matter that when I came to the same conclusion, it would have been so much easier in many instances to follow their advice - it was my journey and I had to design - okay fine, I had to control it for myself.
This is just one more reason I am so thankful for my amazing career in reproductive health. The knowledge I have gained about fertility is priceless and gives me the freedom to make my own reproductive choices. Most women don’t have that luxury and unless they research on their own, they have little knowledge of how the whole fertility thing works.
Reproductive awareness is crucial for men and women, but twenty years ago it was exponentially more taboo to talk about fertility topics openly. Had I not donated my eggs in nursing school and fallen immediately, deeply in love with the fertility field, I never would have ended up working in a fertility clinic helping to make dreams come true, while on the side accumulating a wealth of fertility knowledge and access to the minds of amazing reproductive healthcare experts.
In 2012, at the age of 34, there were a few reasons I froze my eggs besides my need to control everything I possibly could. Time was not on my side but I did not want to rush any major life decisions and needed to give myself peace of mind. After having gone through many, many injections for multiple donor retrieval cycles, I knew that part would be easy for me and I elected to gift myself with a reproductive option, not a future baby guarantee. Essentially, after donating my eggs to others so they would have a chance to conceive, I donated my eggs to myself.
While I certainly would hope for success if I ever decide to conceive using my frozen eggs, I would not expect success. This is not a guarantee and I am 100% aware of that. There are so many variables that affect conception but I know that I am at least giving myself a higher chance for future success if I am unable to conceive naturally than if I had not frozen my eggs.
I kicked my biological clock to the curb and designed my own reproductive destiny. I have a chance for my own biological child, if or when I decide to use it. What I did is not right for everyone, but all women deserve to know all they can about their reproductive options. I only want other women to have the ability to say they chose what was right for them.
One quick nursing type note: Do your homework - make sure whichever fertility clinic you select has a lab with good success for both freezing and warming of eggs. You can’t have one without the other and want a lab with good experience and success rates. Ask your reproductive endocrinologist to review their clinic’s statistics so you can make an informed choice to answer the new, age-old question - To freeze or not to freeze?
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